Life is a gift.
But I am a thief.
I can't have what I want.
Some wishes can't all be grant.
I guess I have to do something.
I need to make some thinking.
But this is not my day.
My world is so gray.
Hoping it is darker.
It feels good, better.
I pray for silence.
Some dense.
But quietness is deafening.

Suffocating.
I am choking.
Need some air.
Gasping.

I have to be bare.
Just to be free,
With glee,
In truth and reality.

...Breathe...
..Yah..
...Feel it...

Lie down on the cold cement.
Hear that beautiful silent.
I can't control my eyes.
I see all the lies.

...Blink...
...Breathe...
...Blink....

Please stop it.

Make me sleep.
I want to crawl on the deep.
Come with me.
Touch me.
Cover me.

I don't want to be alone.
But I don't want to be with anyone.
It's just you
that I hope, wish and pray for
to share this so called life.

Then
maybe
I will appreciate this gift.
then I'll be no longer a thief.
and
maybe,
just maybe
I'll know what happiness and peace means
...
Is that what they called "love"?
I don't know.
I just want to feel it.

Then
maybe
I will live a life with love.

but
now
I am still
Hoping
Wishing
Praying
for
you
to
be
A
Gift
Exclusively
For
Me
...

Pain.
Yes, I guess that's the right word.
A very good old friend of mine once tells me that I love pain.
And I just simply can't help but to laugh
for whose normal enough will love it?
As I am thinking about it now maybe she's right.
She is always been right about me.
Where are you, anyway?
Burst into molecules my friend?
I hope not.
I know you are still there.
Just making all your dreams come true.
How I wish I can talk to you now for it seems like I don't know myself.

I want to be numb to what I am feeling now.
I want to escape from reality.
I want to be lost.
Simply gone.
Far away.
Quiet, deeper, darkest.

Is there someone who knew me?
Is there something you can tell me or share with me?
Is there a day for all of us will understand
and feel what happiness really is?

I just hate this so called pain.
I hate thinking about the what-ifs.
I hate living a life without knowing.
It just keeps me going each empty wrong day.

Breathing. Thinking. Breathing

Counting the hours that passed.
Remembering how long I am alone.
Reminiscing those times I am too certain.
Forgetting that life moves in circles that things do change.

Change.
Sweet cool damn change.
Why the things I value had to be gone?
Why can't it be just those that I don't give a damn?
Why I can't hold on to happiness so
I will never knew this pain?

I want to cry but there are no tears.
I want to scream but the silence is too loud.
I want to throw things hard but I'm weak.

I want change.
Yes.
Another change.

I don't like to be like this anymore.
I don't want to hurt anyone, anymore.
I don't want to hear any plea nor continuous sobs.

I'm sorry, once happy soul.
But don't you know I am hurting too?
Maybe much more to what you are suffering
for I am the reason of your pain.

Boiling, blistering, dying in every burning tears you dropped.
And this is my punishment until you don't stop weeping.
Please stop hating and putting yourself down.

Damn pain.
Wish I could dump.
Dump myself alone without thinking of you.

delete me. erase me. delete me.

isn't it enough for i am in pain knowing you are trying to forget me?

buried me now than keeping me alive.

BURNING.

I don't think I can live without you,
You were my legs to help me walk,
I feel like an infant,
Crippled, unable to do or talk.

I don't think I could breathe without you,
You reminded me to take a deep breath,
Before I plunged into that ocean.
Saving me from death.

I don't think that any part of me,
Could function properly,
And now that your gone,
No part of me will go on.

I know I can't live without you,
Because you are my heart and soul,
And now that your gone,
I have fallen apart, and I'm no longer whole.

It all came so easy, all the loving you gave me the feelings we shared,
And I still can remember how your touch was so tender, it told me you cared
We had a once in a lifetime, but I just couldn't see, until it was gone
A second once in a lifetime, may be too much to ask but I swear from now on.

Now I'm seeing clearly how I still need you near me . I still love you so
There's something between us that won't ever leave there's no letting go
We had a once in a lifetime but I just didn't know it till my life fell apart
A second once in a lifetime isn't too much to ask cause I swear from the heart.

Now you're in my arms again, this time I'll love you much better
Now you're in my arms again, this time I'll hold you forever
This time will never end!!!!

Naglaho na sa akin ang lahat
damdamin muling nasugat
mahirap man tanggapin ngunit ito na yun
tapusin ang lahat at ibaon sa kahapon

Tanawin ang malayo ang tanging alam
pagkat ito na ang huli mong pamamaalam
kailangan nang talikuran ang isa't isa
harapin na nag-iisa ang bawat umaga

Siguro nga'y panahon na para bigyan ang sarili
bigyan ng oras at itabi ang dapat muna isantabi
aminin na nating di na tayo masaya
dito rin naman ang patutunguhan nating dalawa

Isip may tuliro ano pang magagawa ko
ikaw na rin nagsabi na ito ang gusto mo
magkasama nga tayo di naman kita "kilala"
para ano pa, sige na umalis ka na

Parehong pagkakamali, di na ako natuto
ang mahal ko'y itinulak ko papalayo
nagdurusa sa aking pagkakasala
bawiin man ngunit ang lahat ay tapos na

Patawad na lang sa aking kahinaan
alam ko marami akong pagkukulang
ngunit kung tayo'y hanggang dito na lang
ok lang, kahit ako'y nasasaktan

Di naman sa pag-ibig nati'y wala ng halaga
ngunit kailangan kong magpakalayu-layo muna
hanapin at tanungin sa aking sarili
sino nga ba ako at anong aking silbi

Wag kang magtaka kung muli tayong magkita
na ako ay di na gaya noong una
di naman kasi ako bakal para di tablan
siyempre itago ko man, ako pa rin ay nasasaktan

Wag kang mag-alala, wag mo akong isipin
pagpatuloy mo buhay mo ganun din sa akin
dahil kahit ngayon kailangang maghiwalay muna
pag-ibig ko sa iyo'y meron pang natitira.....